Contrary to many swine epidermis prognosticators, I have a strange way of predicting scores. I have a unique way of reading the corns and bunions on my feet, and here's what my feet say with this year's bowl games — and I did not make up some of this year's bowl game names, really!
Famous Idaho Potato Bowl — This was formerly the Humanitarian Bowl on the blue turf at Boise State University. It's Utah State vs. Ohio. I think the Mid-American Conference will prevail as the Bobcats beat the Aggies.
The BBVA Compass Bowl — It's Southern Methodist vs. Pittsburgh. I think the Mustangs have too much offense, and SMU will win this one.
Beef O'Brady Bowl — It's Marshall vs. Florida International. FIU proves once and for all that you can roller skate in a Thundering Herd.
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl — Texas Christian meets Louisiana Tech. I think this game will be very close — until kickoff, that is. TCU wins going away.
Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl — Tulsa, coached by former Spiro Bulldogs coach and Spiro native Bill Blankenship, will meet Brigham Young. I think Blankenship will get his first bowl win as the Golden Hurricane will prevail.
MAACO Las Vegas Bowl — The Boise State Broncos will meet the Arizona State Sun Devils. I really don't think that the Sun Devils can hang with the Broncos.
Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl — Sub-.500 UCLA will meet Illinois. I think the Big 10 (which actually has 12 teams in its new league) will prevail as the Fighting Illini will win.
Bridgeport Education Holiday Bowl — Texas will meet California. I simply don't like Texas. I hope they keep Mack Brown. But, sadly, I think Texas will win.
Sheraton Hawaii Bowl — The Nevada-Reno Wolfpack will meet Conference USA Champion Southern Mississippi. S. Miss. cost C-USA $17 million by beating then-undefeated Houston in the conference championship game Dec. 3 in Houston. The Golden Eagles will fly past and over the Wolfpack.
Advocare V100 Independence Bowl — Missouri of the Big 12 will meet North Carolina. The Tigers will purr it on against the Tar Heels.
Meineke Car Care Bowl — Texas A&M, representing the Big 12 for the final time on the gridiron, will meet Northwestern. The brain school of the Big 10 will meet the Aggies. In a coin toss, my pick ended up being A&M.
Hyundai Sun Bowl — Georgia Tech will face Utah. The Rambling Wreck of Georgia the will run its version of the triple-option to perfection, and knock off the Utes.
Chick-fil-A Bowl — Virginia will meet Auburn. Just what is the mascot of Auburn anyway, the Tiger or War Eagle? In either case, the Tigers claw the Cavaliers.
R&L Carriers New Orleans Bowl — Louisiana-Lafayette vs. San Diego State. If you're not from either school, who really cares about this game? I picked the Ragin' Cajuns because UL-Lafayatte preceeds San Diego State in the alphabet.
Ticket City Bowl — Houston vs. Penn State. The Nittany Lions play strong defense. However, they have never seen a team like the Cougars. I heard the University of Houston's administration is petitioning the NCAA for another season of eligibility for Case Keenum. He has already played six years, and he's going for lucky seven. The Cougars will claw the Nittany Lions.
Valero Alamo Bowl — Baylor will represent the Big 12 against Pacific-12 Conference representative Washington. Heisman Trophy winner Robert Griffin III, a.k.a. “RG3,” and the Baylor offense will simply be too much for the Huskies.
New Era Pinstripe Bowl — Iowa State vs. Rutgers. This game will be played at Yankee Stadium. In the final period, Babe Ruth will pinch hit for the Cyclones and hit a grand-slam home run to lift them past the Scarlet Knights.
Franklin America Mortgage Music City Bowl — Wake Forest will meet Mississippi State. I think the Southeastern Conference will prevail over the Atlantic Coast Conference.
Belk Bowl — Louisville vs. N.C. State. I hope this game is not on at the same time as Pawn Stars. I think the Big East Conference's Cardinals will beat the ACC's Wolf Pack.
Gildan New Mexico Bowl — Wyoming will meet Temple. I'm picking the Owls to win, simply because that's where former Spiro Bulldog and former Canadian Football League Grey Cup quarterback Henry Burris played.
Insight Bowl — Oklahoma vs. Iowa. That's exactly what I need, more insight as to how the defense of of the Sooners had a major implosion in three of its final games this season. If, and that's a big if, OU is focused and learns how to tackle once more, this could be a blowout. If not, it will be close — but I think the Sooners will prevail.
Champs Sports Bowl — Florida State will meet Notre Dame. Dr. Randall Matos is going to be smiling during this game because this could be a blowout in the Seminoles' favor.
AutoZone Liberty Bowl — Cincinnati will face Vanderbilt. The Bearcats will be the Commodores.
Little Caesar's Pizza Bowl — Western Michigan, another Mid-American Conference team, will take on the Big 10's Purdue Boilermakers. Purdue will win. While I'm at it, I would like to order a large pepperoni pizza to go.
tax.slayer.com Gator Bowl — Ohio State vs. Florida. It's the Urban Meyer Bowl, pitting his new team (Ohio State) against his old team (Florida). I think the Buckeyes will win, and let their new coach dot the “I” during the Ohio State University band's halftime performance.
GoDaddy.com Bowl — Northern Illinois vs. Arkansas State. Who cares about this game. I just hope that Danica Patrick shows up and is part of the halftime show. I suppose a uniform malfunction is out of the question?
Allstate Sugar Bowl — Virginia Tech will meet Michigan. The Hokies will knock off the Wolverines.
Military Bowl — Air Force vs. Toledo. Maxwell Q. Klinger will toss the coin, and the Falcons will win.
Discover Orange Bowl — Clemson vs. West Virginia. With Dana Holgerson, the former Oklahoma State offensive coordinator, at the helm, the Mountaineers will have had a month to prepare for the Tigers. The soon-to-be Big 12 member, West Virginia, will beat ACC-member Clemson.
Capital One Bowl — Nebraska, the newest Big 10 team, will meet South Carolina. I would like to see this game end in a tie, but I believe that Steve Spurrier's Gamecocks will prevail.
Outback Bowl — Michigan State vs. Georgia. The Spartans will beat the Bulldogs.
AT&T Cotton Bowl — Arkansas will meet Kansas State. What a mismatch. On one side, you have the bigger, stronger, faster teams of the SEC facing the Wildcats, who took the OSU Cowboys to the wire before losing in Stillwater last month. The Hogs are good, but are they ready for the slowness of the K-State offense? My heart says to go with Kansas State, but my head says “Sooieee!
Rose Bowl — Oregon will play Wisconsin. In this horse race, you have the sleeks registered quarterhorses of the Ducks vs. the clydesdales of the Badgers. If Wisconsin cannot control the pace of the game, it will be a blowout. OK, it will end up being a blowout with the Ducks winning.
Fiesta Bowl — Oklahoma State vs. Stanford. This the first time the OSU Cowboys will be in a Bowl Championship Series bowl game. If their defense can play with the same intensity and finessee as the Cowboys showed against the Sooners in this year's Bedlam game on Dec. 3 at Boone Pickens Stadium, they will corral the Cardinal. OSU should be playing for the BCS Championship, and will make a major statement as they will blow out Stanford.
BCS Championship — No. 1 LSU vs. No. 2 Alabama. I'm already getting excited. I already have Jan. 9, 2012, planned in full. I'm going to turn on the television, and watch “The Storage War Marathon.” I understand that they have a new episode on that night, and Dave Hester will win a locker that's not what he wished for at all. All Oklahomans should boycott this game, and watch something else — or go to the movies, or even a high school basketball if one's taking place. If per chance my TV set breaks down, I'm going out in my front yard, and watch the grass grow. OK, here's my prediction. Contrary to the first meeting in Tuscaloosa, Ala., I believe that LSU is going to be so jacked up that they will win the game by at least three touchdowns. Here's my first prediction for the new year. The Tigers and the Crimson Tide will meet for the national championship game. Stranger things have happened!